A Sense Of Freedom!

Hi everyone! I just finished up a week of teaching and another trip today to the chiropractor. Here are the basic goodies of the week:

1) We dissected pigs in Biology Honors. One student got woozy near the end and had to go to the nurse. I would just once like to do a dissection where no one passes out!

2) The seniors took their final exam in Anatomy Honors. I'm left now with just the juniors so the two Anatomy classes are less than half the size they originally were.

3) As far as I know I am still stuck with the job next year of teaching Chemistry which I am so incompetent to teach. I say as far as I know since the principal never bothered to respond to my email to him explaining that my last Chemistry course was around 33 years ago and I am an established biologist with years of training and teaching experience in the field. Nope, no email, no call, no dropping by the classroom from the principal. I guess I am not important enough for him to waste his time speaking to me.

4) The A/C in the room has been out all week. Parts are ordered and it is supposed to be fixed next week. Until then we are working in a sauna and trying to cool things off a little with fans. It is hot!!!

Now for my thoughts that led to this post title. When I got stuck with the chemistry job I decided to quit teaching as soon as my 30 years are up. That gives me one year more. I could actually quit in the middle of the year next year when my 30 years are up and I just might do that. They can deal with trying to find a mid-year replacement for me and I won't shed a single tear. Suddenly after making this decision to retire I have the feeling that a tremendous burden has been lifted from my shoulders. I will be free of all of the crap that has gradually infiltrated education over the past few years. No more silly, pointless faculty meetings. No more pressure to enhance the school's image, sometimes at the expense of quality teaching. No more pressure to teach towards state tests that don't mean a damn thing to the learning of my students. No more cowering under administrative decrees that are sometimes contradictory and arbitrary, and that rarely take into consideration my feelings or thoughts. No more worrying about the possibility of being called in on the carpet because of this blog. No more being given no school recognition for the years I have given of my life to this profession.

I feel so incredibly free now. I will truly miss the teaching of my fine students. That is really all that I will miss. I realize now that my decision means the school "powers that be" have no power to make me upset any more. I know that I can be my own person this last school year, or 1/2 year, and be proud of having taught several thousand students the best that I could do. I see so many of my former students these days. An assistant to my chiropractor is one of my former Biology students. She is using some of the skills I taught her in her profession. There are many doctors, nurses, and technicians at our local hospital that I helped to train in Biology and Anatomy. Some of them have told me that I helped to inspire them to go into medicine. A number of my students have gone into biological research at laboratories and research stations. It is rare that I don't daily run into at least one student I helped to guide into a Biology related career.

Yes, I wish I would have been treated differently as a teacher after putting in 29 years training future scientists and medical staff. I have no control over that. What gives me great peace and joy is knowing I made a huge difference in so many lives. If I had been dealt with compassionately and respectfully by the administration and allowed to continue doing what I do so well in the field of Biology/Anatomy I would possibly have stayed in the profession another few years. I regret that I am not going to be allowed to continue training future leaders in the biological sciences. I could have inspired perhaps several hundred more students to pursue a biological career before passing on the torch to others. Though that makes me very sad, I suppose all good things must eventually come to an end. I must be satisfied with what I have been able to do these past 29 years in the face of constant educational obstacles and adversity. That will have to be enough. Now I am free to speak my mind honestly about education today. I am free to relax and not be concerned about what administrators will think. My impending retirement gives me the freedom to look back and be very proud of my accomplishments, even if they were not appreciated by anyone except my students and their parents. The important ones are all of those students I guided and inspired. They are my legacy. May all of my former students prosper and enrich the world with their contributions. This situation has broken off my shackles to an educational system that has lost its value of creative, intelligent teachers and the training of wonderful students to strive for success. Now everything is a numbers game. We are supposed to care about the FCAT test percentages, the number of students taking AP exams, the number of awards our athletes can win, the number of items I have to cut due to budget reductions, and how many image conscious newspaper articles we can get published. None of that concerns me now. I am free. What a catharsis this is!!!

"Anyone who doesn't take truth seriously in small matters cannot be trusted in large ones either." - Albert Einstein